Goodbye Old Wounds

I’ve been reminiscing about writing this for a long time now ( Please forgive me for that) I thought I had it all figured out. Today all of a sudden when I was getting ready for bed, I become sad for a lot of reasons and that’s when I knew that I had to write something.

Since I found out the truth, I’m unable to let go. I don’t know how most people do it; smile through the pain, forgive the worst and move on. I can’t do that, I’m only human. I feel pain and anger… My hypothalamus functions in the worst way possible.

But how could she use me like that? She came in the form of a serpant, disguised under a beautiful mask. Her master had set out one mission for her; to destroy me and leave me for dead. And I have to congratulate her because it worked brilliantly! Even better than they had imagined.

I’m cold inside, I can hardly trust people and as for love; I’m divorcing her, its only my destiny. She hurts me every time. I can barely get up now, I’m wounded all over. I can’t help but stare at my bleeding heart, I wonder who’s going to be willing to take care of it now when it’s all damaged like that. I’m going to fulfill my purpose but doing that won’t be easy that’s why I need to go find myself and now I say goodbye to the old wounds, they aren’t a part of me anymore…

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23 thoughts on “Goodbye Old Wounds

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  1. You are not alone, my friend. Today I spoke with a counselor, and he stayed on phone with me until I was ok. I am so glad I called for help, and now I feel like I am going to be ok.

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  2. Going through this kind of betrayal is such a deep, deep wound. I know its a platitude and not much comfort to say its going to take time, but it will, time and a hell of a lot of hurt. Its one of those wounds so outside of your control and that puts you in such a difficult place. Sorry you are in such pain.

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      1. I found poem that speaks to what you are going through last night. Its a bit long to post here and I am a bit tired. But it basically says it takes what it takes in this situation and it hurts and that sucks but is all part of the process. I know how it can feel when it feels as though that pain will never end. And yes, when it passes you will see the light again. Til then hang in there. 🙂

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      2. I understand that you’re quite tired🙂 but again, Thanks for everything. That poem does describe what im going through. Thanks for summarizing it for me.
        May God bless you for your generosity

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  3. When you say that most people can easily let go… well… it’s probably hot they look from the outside. Some wounds are very long to heal, and leave traces. It is a painful process. And if we had already this capacity for letting go we would be enlightened. For the moment just accept what is going on in your mind and heart. Allow it to be. Allow the pain. Analyse things if you need to have a clear picture in your mind. Letting go will happen by itself when you will allow the hurt to do its job…. sometimes we need to go through hard times to get renewed. Just believe that this is for the best.

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  4. I’m sorry you’ve been so hurt by love, and you are definitely not alone 💜 it’s hard, when someone hurts you and leaves you, it makes you feel awful, worthless, what’s the point? But you have to keep going. You’re right, you’re only human, and we feel so many emotions, it’s how we are. Time is the only healer in this, and sometimes it can take longer than we like. And sometimes, you have nights like what you had, where it hits you all at once. And I’m sorry you’re feeling so down because of it

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    1. This means a lot from you. Knowing I’m not alone…. Thanks for taking your time to read and reply to this. It means a lot.
      I certainly know that I’m still going to experience more nights like that but I also know that it will be over in no time🙂

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  5. Hanging on to the anger, hot coals only hurts you… It’s in your gender not her’s and as much as you wish it hurt her… It’s still in your hands… Letting go doesn’t mean it hasn’t happened, hasn’t hurt you… Wounds can take a long time to heal but healing can only begin after letting go… Focus on you and your next step… Look ahead and not behind… Huggles and loves and prayers…

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  6. I’ve seen others hanging on to the past and it keeps them from living in the now… What’s gone is gone… Learn (anything you could have maybe done differently [both more or less]), your take-away to help you grow now, forget… Something just are… Move on… Make amends… No relationship is perfect… With my divorce I faced the fact that if I had been a better wife and done better at seeing his needs our relationship might not have ended… We both expected something that the other hadn’t learned how to do yet… Not that I am saying divorce was acceptable or all my fault, but realize that I too had committed to the failure… I learned and moved on… Today we are friends… I apologized for my part in the breakdown…
    For me, staying close to God helped immensely…
    PS I’m coming up on 23 years with hubby #2

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      1. My children beg me to check my sense of humor at the door… One promised to clean the bathroom for a month asking a roommate to stop!
        I was raised in the peanut gallery… I think my dad actually built it… Let’s just say that be careful to not leave any openings (I bite my tongue often)… One child has been setting up jokes since they were 5…
        The best was setting up an autocorrect for the word “the” every time it changed to “I smell funny”

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